Is it over yet?

Christmas is a time for family, for religious reflection, for food, for charity, and a time to witness the joy as children (and others) unwrap their presents. For the past several years though, I just haven't been able to get into the Christmas spirit.

Maybe it's the lack of a wintery wonderland that I associate with Christmas from my childhood. Maybe it's the commercialism that's become worse and worse each year as retailers remove the calendar gap between selling fireworks for the 4th of July and selling toys and electronics aimed at the Christmas buyers. Maybe it's because I refuse to listen to Christmas music until AFTER Thanksgiving as opposed to when we get home from trick-or-treating (as one local radio station would have us do). Maybe it's the chaotic scheduling around having a split family with siblings and extended family on both sides to find time to share presence with. Maybe it's the added frustration of all the items that jump out of their hiding spots in closets and the garage once a year to make our living room feel even smaller. Maybe it's just the stress built up at work as projects try to wrap up at year-end. Maybe it's the frustration that I want to be one of those parents that buys my kids something big and flashy for Christmas, but can't afford to.

Or maybe it's something completely different. I don't know.

I enjoy the time with family (immediate and extended), some of whom I only see on holidays, but I'm really glad when I go back to work and return to a "normal" schedule.

I feel bad about feeling bad about Christmas, which just makes me feel worse. I want to get back (?) to a time where Christmas is a fun time. A time I can enjoy without regard to anything else that's going on. A time when I can release the chaos and just enjoy the moment. A time when I can stand outside on the porch with my family on Christmas Eve, look up at the sky and catch a snowflake on my tongue. A time when we all cuddle up by a fire and read 'Twas the night before Christmas and then tuck my little ones and my wife safely in bed before retiring myself in preparation for the excitement of the Christmas morn.

Maybe it's all part of parenting, of growing up, replacing the fun of Christmas with the function of Christmas. But that's not right. I don't want Christmas to be a function. I want Christmas to be a fun time -- to be a worry-free time to enjoy life and family. I want THAT as my Christmas present next year.

Bah Humbug, Merry Christmas and Happy Holidays to you and yours...