I'm dying...

...but first a little background.

About 6 months ago, my wife got this crazy idea about throwing me a surprise birthday party. She hates surprises herself, but she decided to inflict a little pain on me. So she goes about tracking down and contacting family, co-workers and friends (some of which I've not seen in about 10 years), setting up this elaborate ruse. She's immediately archiving any emails (so that I don’t' accidentally see them on our shared computer). She's using non-sense file names on the documents she saves and putting them in folders (both logical and physically) that I would never look in. She's cutting people off on the phone if I'm around. She's using my Google-ing tricks I've taught her in the past to dig up people when she doesn't even know where they live.

She didn't want to do it in April (the month of my birthday), because I would expect it more then. By having it in June, she could play it off as the kids' party. There were clues, in retrospect, that I should've latched on to, but as I related today to a co-worker who was unable to attend, I didn't have a picture to piece the puzzle together.

• My mother-in-law is up from North Carolina (like she is usually every year or so, either in the summer around the middle and oldest's birthdays, or the fall around the time of my youngest's birthday) – nothing unusual.
• Having a kids' party is fairly normal, though I thought she had sworn off anything big last year.
• Lots of chairs showing up in the garage - no biggie - they were for the kid's party.
• Not needing help with invites, cake, etc - no concern - she likes to be in control of those things and I figured her preparation was enough that it was all under control.
• No cake the morning of the party - explained by the fact that my step-mom was supplying it and would bring it with her when she came
• My oldest got to invite a friend to the party (we were keeping it small). My middle child got to invite a friend to the party, but when he called, my wife told him to tell his friend that he had to be here by 11:15. 11:15? I thought that the party didn't start until 12:30. "That'll give them time to play alone before the party," my wife said. OK, believable.
• My wife's grandparents were in from Florida, and she had convinced a few relatives that they rarely see to come to the party and she wanted it to be a surprise for him. I was supposed to take him out of the house for an hour when he got to the house that morning so that when we came back it would be a surprise that the relatives were already there. OK, I can help with that.
• "No, you don't need to park down at the school," I heard my wife tell my mom. My mom's funny that way sometimes :-)
• "Not sure how we're gonna fit 51 people in the house if it rains" – I never kept track of how many people came to the kids' parties in the past.
• A ham in the fridge and then the oven that I didn't seem to notice. I was busy with other things.
• We spent several weekends before the party getting the outside spruced up and the inside cleaned. – needed to be done anyway, and I think that I was the one pushing the outside more anyway.
• I never saw the invites. She found the invites at the last minute and got them mailed out the same day (or something close to that), so there was no time to show me ahead of time. Plausible. (She did find a blank one to show me a couple of weeks ago to stave off any lingering curiosity she thought might be building.

The morning started with a little rain. Just enough to have us all panicked about what we were going to do if it kept up. Grandpa arrived and I did my duty taking him out for some last minute items from Costco (so his relatives could sneak in ahead of us). She had told everyone to arrive between 10:30 (when I was taking Grandpa away) and 11:15 (since I was supposed to be back at 11:30) or they'd need to wait until 12:00 so that they didn't pull up as I did and ruin the surprise in case I was late.

When we got back and headed up to the house, I tried to let Grandpa in first, but he held the door for me. Not wanting to be too aggressive, I obliged and went in. SURPRISE!!! I looked around and saw a bunch of family sitting on chairs and the couch. Then I kept scanning and saw co-workers, and then the friend from 10 years ago (I think I literally did a double-take!). Wait a minute... As the flashes of paparazzi cameras started lighting up the room, I think it finally set in, that I had been tricked! it was a surprise for ME!

I didn't even realize that it was JUST my party until almost the end of the gathering. With the exception of my co-workers and a few old friends, everyone else would've shown up for the kids' party. I thought the additional friends were just an add-on to the KIDS' party. Now I feel a little bad that I didn't spend more time mingling with everyone because they were ALL there for ME.

It was good to see old friends, and that so many people showed up – for ME! I was truly surprised, and pleased.

As the day went on, I started learning little bits about the planning of this charade. I think other than the final surprise, what shocked me the most was that all three kids kept the secret for a lot longer than I thought possible. My youngest reminded me later (he's not yet 6), that if I ever had any secrets for him to keep, he'd do a great job of it.

I made the comment to my wife last week when she was trying to convince me to go to her reunion this summer with her that I didn't like big crowds of people -- and I don't like being the center of attention, either.

So, back to my dying comment… What I should've said was that I was dying to say "THANKS" to my wife and kids and all who helped prepare for the party, and all of you who were part of the surprise. Thanks, for being part of my party. Thanks for keeping the surprise. Thanks for being there. Thanks for the presents (that you weren't supposed to bring). Thanks for the food. Thanks for being some part of my past 40 years. I hope you'll all be there for some part of the next 40!

PS. If you're missing a container, let us know. We have a few leftovers.

PPS. I have no life-threatening illnesses that I know about at this time :-)