A thousand miles away... and right next door.

Actually 2,476 miles one way according to Visual Trace Route. That's the distance from my computer to Facebook's servers in Palo Alto, CA. I don't particularly care for Facebook (except some of the games I sneak a play at when my wife leaves it logged in), but my wife has quite enjoyed the social site. She's used it to keep track of and contact with friends from high school, friends from around the world she met when she was pregnant with each of our kids, and also to get to know a woman that lives across the street.

When our neighbors first moved in a few years ago, we met them and shared a few moments. Said "Hi" as we passed in the morning and then in the evening -- reminds me of this classic Looney Toons encounter ( you can restart at the beginning of the video if you want to see the whole clip, but I queued it up for you).



Anyway, back to my story... So my wife and I know the neighbors, and see them quite often, in fact. We don't hang out together, but we both have kids, so we often ended up at the same place. On top of that, the dad, works for a company that hosts local events that we visit occasionally.

Several months ago, and I'm not sure exactly what led to this, my wife and the neighbor found each other on Facebook. They've shared laughs, insights, recipes, parenting stories, histories, and I'm sure a few complaints (even about their "better halves" I'm sure). My wife commented at one point that she had learned more about our neighbor since catching her on Facebook, than in the several years we lived right across the street.

We were not isolated, or I didn't think so, but there's something about the impersonal intimacy of the Internet. I've said things on this blog that I couldn't see myself saying directly to someone. And I'm not alone, I'm sure.

Facebook is about socializing. I'm not a socializer. I'd MUCH rather be 1 on 1 with someone than at a party. I'm not sure what it is -- competition? insecurity? obligation? some other phobia? Facebook is about sharing your life, often one tiny piece at a time (with almost Twitter-esque updates about what each of your friends is doing right this very instant, which Friends character they're most like, something about poking, and other little inane snippets). It's certainly easier to post one update on Facebook than to send a bunch or emails, or heaven forbid -- make a bunch of phone calls -- when something happens in your life, but the impersonal intimacy allows you to put it out there, and let others catch up as they want to, in their own time.

There are certainly benefits to sites like this, and to the Internet in general. I don't think there is anyone who can debate that. It's all in how you use it. What you gain from it varies from person to person. A new business opportunity? A few minutes of mindless video watching or mind exercising video games? The location of the nearest registered sex offender so that you can keep your kids safe. The information needed for a research paper. The phone number of your favorite pizza place?

A closer friendship with a neighbor...